LOTUS blog

A high school valedictorian asked FARK readers to help him write his graduation speech, sort of like the famous “Wear Sunscreen” column.  By the way, it’s usually falsely attributed to Kurt Vonnegut.  I imagine that the original author, Mary Schmich, can’t be too upset given that many writers would love to be compared to Vonnegut.

Anyway, submit your pearls of wisdom or vote on the best.  Here are some of my favorite submissions:

You will end up regretting what you didn’t do more then all the stupid things that you do end up doing. So kiss the girl/guy and stay for the last dance.

Don’t cook bacon naked.

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

When you’re struggling to grab the brass ring in life, be aware that you might be already holding a gold one in your other hand.

Go out, make millions, and never forget your good buddy the valedictorian.

By Ashley Emans, University of Florida

On November 13, several student groups at The University of Florida held a viewing and a panel discussion of the documentary film Obsession: Radical Islam’s War Against the West. Fliers advertising the event (which had of course been repeatedly torn down by free speech loving liberals) contained the phrase, “Radical Islam Wants You Dead.” Now the university administration is demanding an apology from the five hosting student organizations: College Republicans, Law School Republicans, the Jewish Law Students Association, the Jewish Student Union, and Gators For Israel. This is likely the direct result of Islam On Campus lobbying the highest ranking UF officials, including President Bernie Machen, for an investigation into the event and its advertising.

Vice President for Student Affairs, Dr. Patricia Telles-Irvin, sent an email to every single UF student on Monday, November 26 that explained the university’s disapproval of the advertisements and asked for an apology and clarification. The letter was slavish, bland, hypocritical, and disappointing. In it she fell all over herself in a rush to restore the Gator universe back to its proper leftward rotation.

“At the University of Florida we have embraced a set of values, one of which is diversity. Diversity is not just about having representation from various cultures on campus, it also is having each member contribute to an inclusive and safe environment and collectively enhancing our understanding and appreciation of the richness brought by such differences.” wrote Telles-Irvin. UF does so much hand-wringing over racial/ethnic/class/gender/religious diversity, yet it shuns the most important type of diversity a college could ever give: diversity of thought. Conservative impulses are swiftly suppressed, in and out of class, just as the Obsession kerfluffle has proved. Dr. Telles-Irvin and the rest of the administration apparently believe students who feel threatened by radical Islam have forfeited their rights of expression by not falling in line with what is the acceptable opinion according to them, namely that you are not allowed to fear radical Islam.

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I feel like it starts earlier and earlier every year!  I mean, burqas in the stores in March?!?!?

All kidding aside, here’s some advice to all of you libtards on these college campuses: Don’t even think of trying to disrupt these important events.  My BFF and SAS-trained bodyguard will not be amused.

This week the once-esteemed Columbia University will host another speaker in its on-going “Conversations with Islamo-Fascists” series. I can hear the speaker’s introduction music now:

You can reach me by caravan,
Cross the desert like an Arab man
I don’t care how you get here,
Just get here if you can

This is the second time that Columbia University has invited Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to speak on their campus. His first speech was canceled because of security concerns. No, not security concerns over inviting a terrorist to an American university, but concerns that they couldn’t guarantee the safety of the terrorist.

Read the rest of my column this week here.

“The darkest places in hell are reserved for those who maintain their neutrality in times of moral crisis.” — Dante’s Inferno

Read Columbia alumnus David Horowitz’s reaction to Ahmadinejad’s upcoming speech.  By the way, after writing my column on Ahmadinejad this week (check Townhall on Monday), I can understand why Ann Coulter used short-hand.

What wisdom would we impart to the world if it were our last chance?  At many colleges and universities, their best professors are asked to participate in a series in which they are to give a lecture as if it were their last.  For one professor, it’s more than a hypothetical exercise.  Randy Pausch, a professor of computer science at Carnegie-Mellon University, jokes that he “nailed” it.  Professor Pausch has pancreatic cancer and doctors estimate he only has a few weeks or months left to live. 

Watch excerpts of his inspirational lecture, courtesy of WallStreetJournal.com.  Professor Pausch says, “If I don’t seem as depressed or morose as I should be, sorry to disappoint you.”

Watch his entire lecture, “Achieving Your Childhood Dreams.”

Columnist Cal Thomas noted this week that for the second year in a row, students from Ivy League universities didn’t earn above a D+ in the Intercollegiate Studies Institute’s civics test.

Take the test here and share your score in the comments section.  

Below is an article written by my former intern, Ashley Emans, a student at the University of Florida who attended Senator Kerry’s speech earlier this week.  (PS — Boo Gators, Go Seminoles!)

Whose Free Speech Was Violated?

Ashley Emans, UF ‘09

There was a major violation of the First Amendment at my school on Monday.  The victim?  Massachusetts Senator John Kerry.  And, every other person in the University of Florida auditorium that afternoon, including myself.  In fact, there was only one person there whose rights were not violated, and his name is Andrew Meyer.  Mr. Meyer was shot with a taser gun after being violent and disruptive during a town hall forum with the senator.  Liberals are busy shouting about the supposed infringement on Andrew’s free speech rights, but it is actually the other way around.  When someone is being disorderly, is flailing around in a threatening mode, and is refusing to let anyone else speak, as Andrew was, the Constitution requires he be stopped to protect the free speech rights of others.  The senator was gracious to talk with us students at all (and for free, as current legislators cannot charge for speaking appearances).  Yet Andrew never once showed any interest in listening to Kerry.  He yelled at him, and spouted his generic Amerikkka-type conspiracy theories in a strongly inappropriate manner.  There may be freedom of speech, but not freedom from consequence.  From what I saw, the tasing was justified.

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